Thursday, November 8, 2007

Celebrity DUI-sh


"I'm not drunk," Mickey Rourke reportedly told officers at the scene. “I didn't even drink that much."

How many times have I said that one? Give me a break, Mickey! The Hollywood star was pulled over on a SCOOTER - for God sakes. I mean, how dooshy do you have to be to accomplish something that lame? What was it, canary yellow? It would be one thing if he was caught speeding in a jacked-up Lincoln Navigator with some hoes in the back and “a white powdery substance” in his pocket that wasn’t his. But no, he was caught “swerving” down the street. DUI aside, his mug shot [a true declaration of dooshiness - the leathery skin, greasy hair, and reverse-Hitler with chinstrap facial monstrosity] made me really think, is this a requirement for a celebrity has been? My sources say yes, and the eight ball [no pun intended] reveals “It is decidedly so.” Well, there you have it folks. I say, "Take that smirk off yo' face DOOSH!"

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